13 March 2016

A Campaign Gone Insane

On the morning of 04 March I lit up Google News; the first headline I saw:

Donald Trump Makes His Penis a Campaign Issue During Debate

And that's not TMZ, the Onion, or Comedy Central—it's freaking NBC.

I passed on watching the debate that triggered that jewel, but this has truly gotten out of, um, hand.

During another free-for-all that would shame a high school debate team, "Little Marco" [Rubio, the nickname with which the Donald chides him] hopped on board the crazy train and made the now infamous (and possibly shark-jumping) remark about Trump's hands and "what they say about people with small hands."

I'm not asking for [insert deity here] to take me, but I'm still hoping to exit before the defecation starts to really hit the ventilation. I ain't wealthy enough to survive what's coming.

A battle between Trump and Sanders—sociopath versus socialist—would at least be interesting and pit, whatever the outcome, two people's choice candidates against each other. A battle between Trump and Clinton will just be a matter of time. I hope so, anyway, assuming one good thing Secretary Clinton can do is defeat that menace, if only to prove that any "defeat" of Wall Street she may have promised was pure bullshit.

By the laws of overcompensation, including his big swinging Boeing 737 (Gulfstream ain't big enough) and screwing TRUMP in yuuuge gold letters to everything he owns (and some things he doesn't), all indicators point toward the Donald not swinging much pipe. But returning to reality, Ron Jeremy or Adolph Hitler, what's penis size got to do with the qualifications of who occupies the Oval Office? Then again, much of Hitler might be explained by that messed up junk with which we somehow recently discovered he was equipped. Maybe we should ask Trump to lay his shaft of gold out on the table. Hand size may have no correlation to dick size, but dick size may tie into level of psychosis.

Right about here is where a "Nobody has a bigger pair of balls than Hillary" joke would fit in.

As this election run-up keeps proving—If you think this is bad, just wait—it has once again done just that. Violence has finally come to the Trump campaign trail. Not that it comes as a surprise, but it's no less disturbing to see when the powder starts to blow.

The division of these United States keeps chugging along. Booze is no longer an option, but pharmaceuticals do help me cope with watching my country collapse.